A Clintasha Story
by BubbleGumYum10
Summary: The not so romantic story of a spy and a guy who doesn't deserve to be hurt.


**Dang dude, it has been weeks, WEEKS, since I've uploaded anything. I feel so lazy and bad all of a sudden... Sorry about that, but I had this major writers block and couldn't write anything that didn't sound like I wrote it in my sleep. So, I sat down and forced myself to write this, because Clint and Natasha need some love after all of my crazy stories bordering on FrostIron and Stony. Thank you everyone who reads my stuff and favorites and reviews and what not, so enjoy!  
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**Disclaimer: Marvel and who ever else owns all characters used in this story. **

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Natasha P.O.V

People are always asking, exactly what kind of relationship do Clint and I have. And, I never answer, because I don't know. And, Clint never answers, because he doesn't know either. We just don't know.

Sure, we can say were partners, because, we are, but people will still prod deeper, "but is that all," they always want to know. And, we can't answer that either, because we just don't know.

Clint has been my one true friend for the hardest years of my life. He's always been here for me, cheering me on, catching me when I fall, and just making those little enjoyable moments in life so much more enjoyable. He's my tether, my tether to reality. When I get stuck so deep into this life that I've dug out for myself, and am lost and trapped in that hole of sorrow, Clint's always been there to smile and say, "Tasha, come on, buck up, your better than this."

So, I need him. I need him to survive. To live life at it's fullest. To keep going at it every day, giving it my all. To believe that things can get better...and will. He's my proof that life can be filled with happiness if you allow yourself to see through the despair and find that which makes you happy. And for me, that's Clint.

So...I guess that entitles us as friends. But, that's were we come to a violent, lurching, stop. Right at couple. Example being Tony and Pepper. "Are you like them," people ask, and I just walk away, because I don't know. I will admit that at times, I have thought Clint to be an attractive person. Who wouldn't? He has those sweet eyes, that warm smile, and that slightly tousled hair, he's good looking, and that's the truth. But I tell myself that it's just my feminine side talking, that all women find something attractive in almost every man at some point. Because...I just can't see us together.

I honestly cannot see sitting on some bench by a pond, swans gracefully swimming across the clear, blue water, the sunset bathing us in it's warm shine, his hand on mine, and our shoulders touching as we lean into each others embrace. That's just not us. We don't belong in that kind of world...or, at least I don't. Though, he deserves someone, someone who he can be with, someone who will sit at that bench with him, and soak up that sun, and not pull away as their lips brush together. He deserves someone normal. Someone who won't lie to him. Someone who isn't me.

There are plenty of young women out there that would die to be with Clint Barton. Dozens of young women who squeal with delight when he gives them his autograph, laughing nervously as they swarm around him, giving me looks of hidden disdain as he puts his finger up, signaling that he'll only be a minute. So, why doesn't he understand that? Why doesn't he understand that the two of us just wouldn't work out? That we're just not meant to be together? That the fates we're against us from the beginning, and he probably knows this.

Clint probably knows, and has known for a long time, that if we were ever to be together, it would be a struggle. Their would be fights, insults, punches and kicks thrown, hurtful words spat at each other day and night. He knows this. As do I, which is why I can't put him through it all. I can't let Clint go through all of that torture and hurt. He deserves the best, he doesn't deserve someone who would lie to him the second that Nick Fury said, "Agent Romanoff, you've got a new mission."

How would I be able to live with myself? To look in a mirror and see the face of a women who had lied to a man like that a second time? I wouldn't be able to...It would be too much.

So why doesn't Clint understand that?!

Why does he insist on becoming closer? Why does he insist that we hang out more after work, that we go to the movies, or go to the circus because it's in town for only a few days? Why won't he just leave it the way it is...and save himself all of that hurt and sorrow? Because he's Clint, that's why. If there's a possibility, then he'll make a go for it. That's just the kind of guy he is. The best guy I've ever met. The kind of guy that doesn't deserve to be hurt.

And that's why I reach over and gently close the box on his shaking palm shut. The way his eyes widen slightly, and bottom lip trembles kills me inside. And, I almost regret it, but the thought passes, because I know what needs to be done. For my good...and, for his good. Looking down at his kneeling figure, I lean forward and press a kiss to his warm cheek, and he lifts his face up carefully, the beginning of tears evident in this beautiful eyes. "Tasha," he mumbles, confusion and sadness in his voice.

"I'm sorry, Clint...but...I can't marry you."

I straighten up and turn my back on the only person who I've ever cared for.


End file.
